Parents are trying to do their best for their children. They are using this outdated motivational method with good intentions. Just as their parents were with them. They want their kids to grow up to be independent, resilient, good moral citizens with good jobs. Of course they don’t realise the damage shame can cause over time...
Many of us have grown up in an authoritarian society where the big people had all the power and the children had little to none. Have you ever thought about how these feelings effect us when we come face-to-face with power struggles with our children?
When children are showing us challenging behaviours, what they are really asking for is our help, and we can help them through more connection and love (rather than disconnection and punishment). The trouble is trying to remember this in the heat of the moment!
Empaths feel everything SO deeply, they naturally connect in and take on the feelings of other beings. So being in crowded places can be really confusing, overwhelming and often leaves them feeling chaotic and ungrounded. So how do you know if it’s bad behaviour or if your child is really sensitive?
Rather than ‘attention seeking,’ let’s try looking at the witching hour through a different lens.
It’s the most heart breaking thing when you have to leave for work or drop your child at daycare/ school and they don’t want to say goodbye. Here’s 3 tips to help.
What can sometimes be a source of frustration for many parents is that after spending time connecting with their children, challenging behaviours like tantrums, throwing toys, shouting or hitting will rear their heads.
This is what I call the new generation of children coming through. These children tend to be more sensitive, strong willed, intuitive, and empathic than appeared in the past.
If you connect with your children because you should or because of self judgement or guilt, you will start feeling resentful / impatient/ angry towards your children about the time you spend with them.
Holding space for our children means that we are allowing them to express themselves without reservation. We are not there to fix or advise, our role in holding space is to listen. This definitely takes practice! Here’s 5 key phrases to use in the heat of the moment.